Change is coming.

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Change is coming:

I’ve always loved the East Coast because of the clearly defined seasons that part of the country experiences.

My dad’s parents lived in North Carolina and when we were little and could all fit in a station wagon, we would take road trips to visit them. It was always in the summer time and the humidity was obnoxious. But as kids we were generally oblivious to the constant sweat dripping from our noses, because we were so busy playing in the red clay dirt with my cousins. We seriously drove my mom crazy with the stains that covered our clothes after a day of discovery in the local woods.

Those were great times and the only chances I had to enjoy the Eastern part of the United States.

Until I married my husband, Joe.

Joe was born in Long Island, New York and moved to California many years before I met him.  But his heart lived in the city of NY where he’d had many years of meeting life head on as he grew into the man he is today.

For our honeymoon he took me to visit the city that never sleeps, and my heart fell in love all over again. Our time strolling down 5th Ave. going to the top of the World Trade Center, sightseeing at the Statue of Liberty and taking the ferry to Ellis Island sewed into my spirit a hunger for more. Not just for New York City but for life experiences that I’d missed while I was raising my drug addicted children and moving from one marriage to the next trying not to drown in the chaos of my every day existence.

Trips to the East Coast became more frequent, and two years ago I was delighted when we decided to take a road trip across the USA. That adventure changed me.

Forever.

 

I have always loved the seasons.

When I was 21 and newly married to my first husband, we moved to Butte, Montana. It was there that I began to fully experience life with seasons. We had a full year in what I believed was the coldest place on earth. I’d never heard of plugging your car into an electrical socket before you want to bed. But it didn’t take me long to “Get it.” It was freezing there and there was snow. Lots of snow.

 

And there were seasons. Ice melting and flowers beginning to poke their heads up through the thawing ground. Summers with baseball games and Dairy Queen as the sun began to fade behind the mountains. Leaves changing colors and slowly lilting to the ground as they let go of the branches they called home. And then the soft snowflakes that fell peacefully outside the bay window as the fires burned inside the warm houses that lined the quaint and quiet streets.

Oh how my heart knew it was home. Living in a place where the seasons greeted me when I opened my front door filled me with a joy for life I’d never tasted before. It was like God was pouring His heart of love right into me. I was getting a love transfusion each time I stepped outside into His world. I was so hungry for His presence, and I each time I found myself in a space where the seasons lived, I vibrantly came alive.

In that place I was reminded that if God created the world to go through transformation each year, then He must have made me with the same plan in mind.

The earth doesn’t produce 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and 365 days a year so why did I think I was supposed to?

Where did I get the notion that I was designed to work, make it happen, get more, be more, have more, produce and work so more?

That was the lie I bought into each day as I got up and tried to figure out how to live a productive life.

 

And somewhere along the path of life I discovered something new and profound.

 

I am the seasons and as they changed, I changed too.

 

On our trip across country I, once again, was coming into a “fall” of my life and God was preparing me to shed the things that no longer served me. Ideas, beliefs, behaviors and patterns.

I sat quietly in our friend’s home with coffee in hand and watched as the colors of the leaves went from vibrant greens to rich shades of crimson red, sunflower yellow and hot orange. At the same time I felt my soul evolving into soft and subtle shades of kindness, compassion and understanding.

Each morning I was greeted with God’s reminder that He is the designer of this incredibly majestic world and of my life. I need not worry or scurry or fear as the leaves of my life begin to fall at my feet. I need only trust the process of this great and glorious God.

I let go. I became still and I knew that winter was not far behind.

 

Winter was coming to steal the leaves from the boughs of the trees that had held them since they first bloomed in the spring.  My own personal winter had arrived as well, to pluck my obsessive need for external accomplishments that had painted my life with defining colors of success and failure.

 

As the leaves dropped one by one to the frozen ground, the homes that were hidden behind those trees began to light up with warm amber lights shining through frosted window panes.  A life that had been buried behind the thick forests, shared silent smoke signals letting me know that there was an unknown world ready to be seen.

Could it be my new world I was getting a glimpse of? 

Was there more for me than I could ever imagine?

If I was willing to release my need to control the lives of my children, my marriage, my business and my own life,  let go of cars, and abandoned old, stale and learned beliefs, would I begin to breath more easily and see the new doors that were about to open?

The answer was YES!

I was being transformed and I knew it, felt it, believed it and trusted it.

God was helping me to live out the seasons of my life with more color and passion than I could ever have created on my own.

Change was coming. And I was thrilled.

A little nervous but none the less, excited and grateful to be here and to share my love for life with you.

What changes are you getting ready to experience? What old beliefs are you being prepared to let go of? What new and exciting doors are being opened for you, and are you willing to step through them and live your life OUT LOUD?

Remember that you are never alone, and that the world and the love of others are walking with you as you are led to a peace beyond your human understanding.

It’s going to be quite a ride. Buckle up. The ride is about to begin.

 

 

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One thought on “Change is coming.

  1. Susan I love your blog and really like what you wrote “I am the seasons and as they changed, I changed too.” I lost my parents a couple of years ago and for such a long time I was parlayed and trying to make sense of everything. Since I started my Mary Kay business being surrounded by such positive influences I was able to restore my relationship with God and little by little I am accepting and embracing change. It is scary but I am excited and my faith is stronger than before so I am praying for guidance and courage to be bold in my faith and with my Mary Kay business. My desire is to help other women like me that come from a dysfunctional background but want change in their life and are determined to not let their past define who they are. Thanks for the inspiration! I know God gave me this little break at work to read your blog. God Bless you 🙂

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